


Happy Endings

by soaringslash



Category: BlazBlue
Genre: Angst, Family, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Jin-centric, Mental Health Issues, Post-Canon, its sayas birthday, jins just a traumatized little boy who grew up in all the wrong ways in this essay i will, maybe a character study of sorts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2020-10-07
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:42:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26870842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soaringslash/pseuds/soaringslash
Summary: Ragna is happy. Jin is not. That’s okay, though: it’s what they both deserve.
Relationships: Jin Kisaragi & Ragna the Bloodedge, Jin Kisaragi & Saya (Blazblue)
Kudos: 11





	Happy Endings

Things are as they should be, now. Ragna lives with Saya (and Saya, and Saya and Sayaandsaya _andsayaand-)_ and Noel and Lambda and Nu, is safe and happy in his simple little life in a church in the middle of nowhere.

Jin does not, cannot, will not live with them. He’s learned better now, knows he will only ruin what they have and he can’t bear to take it all away again.

Still, when called for, he comes.

His major uniform has been done away with for all the trappings and titles of the head of his family. He is older now, has managed to seal off the last remnants of Jin inside his new self as Jin Kisaragi.

When the door opens, he says, “Ragna,” and Ragna smiles.

Jin is so, so tired.

But he’s learned to hide it, learned to hold Yukianesa just so, so that he can lean some of his weight on her. An entourage of servants each morning to cover up his eyebags with concealer, to tone his skin from its sickly, waxen pale. He watches them with a caution cultivated through a lifetime of danger, but ironically he is safer as head than heir. The threats are outside his family now, not within.

His adopted siblings still scorn him, but they need his favor, too.

Ragna grins fondly and ruffles his hair, “Look at you, all grown up.”

 _No,_ Jin wants to say, but doesn’t. He never- He can’t-

The little boy trapped inside him wails, begs to break down and _confess_ but he won’t. Not in this life. Not again. 

“No thanks to you,” he says instead, and it’s a sign of how far they’ve come that Ragna only laughs.

“Yeah, yeah, quit naggin’ me, you did fine for yourself. Come on in.” He steps aside and allows Jin to enter.

The church has changed little over the years. Ragna and the others fixed it up when they moved back in, so it feels even more like they’ve travelled back in time. 

Jin mostly feels sick. He does not belong here - _then make it yours,_ Yukianesa roars, but he has long stopped listening to her. 

Saya’s appearance does little to help his nausea. “Jin,” she says, a small, careful smile on her face. She does not trust him.

Jin does not trust himself.

“Saya,” he says, his voice cool and smooth as ice. 

Ragna stands between them to stop a fight that isn’t forthcoming.

“... Happy birthday.” He reaches into his pocket to hold out her present: a silvery bracelet set with rubies; it is unwrapped but he will be forgiven for that, because he has brought a gift at all.

Saya gasps, “It’s beautiful!” and politely doesn’t mention the way he drops it in her hands like it offends him. “Thank you!”

Jin nods stiffly. 

She is… happy. She is safe. That sick envy curls in his gut at the thought no matter how he pushes it back - _I was in front of you, all along, so why did you choose to save_ her _instead?_

Ragna’s hand lands on his head. He’s so desperate to lean into that touch that it aches, but he manages to keep steady.

 _Good job,_ Ragna’s eyes say, and not too long ago Jin would have been so pleased with that approval. Now, it only presses against his restraint like a bruise.

He wants to go home.

He doesn’t have a home. He gave up that right long ago... But is it such a crime to wish, plead, hope?

Yes. A thousand times yes. He clenches his fist hard enough to leave little half-moons of blood in his palm, and he hates that too.

“It’s been a long trip. Do you mind if I rest?”

“Before cake?” Ragna gasps, feigning shock. The next moment he is ruffling his hair again, “Yeah, no problem kid. We fixed up your room for ya.”

He is led to his room by the hand - and that contact sends another electric spark through him that might have been comforting were it not so painful - and he forces out his thanks through all the other words lodged in his throat.

He doesn’t know if he’s gotten good at this, at pretending, or if Ragna has simply stopped paying attention. Either way, his brother doesn’t comment beyond “Rest well!” and an easy smile as he closes the door to get on with Saya’s celebration.

Jin collapses onto the bed.

He still holds Yukianesa, because she is solid and real and he needs that, needs stability when the world is once again careening out of his hands. 

No, no. It was never his to have to begin with.

He hasn’t taken off his clothes, but that doesn’t matter. He is tired.

This room smells like childhood, like better days, like Ragna. Sweet summer grass and woodsmoke and dishsoap.

Jin closes his eyes. He tilts his head into the pillow and finally, finally lets the tears fall. He doesn’t feel any better for it, but that’s okay. He wasn’t expecting to. He doesn’t deserve to. 

He slips into the brief respite of his dreamless sleep.


End file.
